But what is it?

I was trying to figure out when Madison started feeling like home. It seems that the transition happened when I moved away from campus and started actually doing things around town instead of staying only near the campus area. Sounds about right. I drove around this morning, with the thought that it wouldn't be a place that I'd mind staying in for awhile. I'll see where the wind takes me, I guess.

My voice is gone! Well, it's kind of coming back now, or rather, it was before practicum this morning. I've been rocking the tea yesterday and today, and I think that that's helping. As are the copious amounts of ibuprofen that I've been downing. (But not really. I'm well within the limit.) So the voice returned this morning, but talking over kids at practicum killed it again. My throat doesn't hurt at all, though, which is pretty convenient. It just makes me more difficult to understand than my usual mumbling does.

I want to insert a picture. For the heck of it. Down with my usual text-heavy posts! We will instead have a random picture of a V-8 botttle tracing that I did for art class last semester, which only looks alright because the assignment was to trace something and then color it in. I can't really draw.

Proof:

(Why yes, that astronaut and flamingo are on the moon together.)

Okay. I had my second possible student teaching placement observation today. I really liked my first classroom a lot, and got a bad vibe from the phone conversation that I had with this second teacher. She actually looks really similar to an amazing third grade teacher at my elementary school, which automatically put in that positive connection, and made the observation perhaps more positive than it would be otherwise? I don't know. It didn't seem that bad. I think I could student teach at either place and be happy. The first location would end up being my first choice and this second one would be my second choice, as I was not as blown away by the positivity of my observation today.

Oh no, I wasn't.

In addition to having my Muir observation today, I also had my first practicum observation. Luckily, it was a really casual observation and I didn't have to be doing anything specific, as my teaching anything today wouldn't have worked out very well. Voice! But that went well. Logan cracks me up-- he's the kind of kid who'd be so easy to be annoyed by, because he's so whiny and baby-ish, but I just love this kid to pieces. He asked me today if he could give me a hug. I think I need to sneakily record his voice. . . it's so odd and whiny sounding. They had three jobs to do while working on a patterns sheet-- 1) write their name on top 2) cut 3) glue. Logan calls out (whines out?), "I can only do one of my jobs!" In his little whiny voice. A bit too amused? Perhaps. He's a character, though.

Then there's James, who smells more strongly of cigarettes than anyone I've ever smelled, always has wet socks (which I thought were only annoying on myself, but helping him put his shoes on is fairly gross) and loves to talk to me about Xbox games. Sure, we can talk about Sonic. What other games do you play, James? Connections! Sonic seems to be the favorite, but I'm not sure exactly which game he's actually playing. Sweet kid, very confusing.

Luke kind of reminds me of Smalls from The Sandlot. In appearance, mostly. He loves to talk.

Jamila shocks me every time she opens her mouth, because it happens so rarely. I think she actually has a southern accent, but I've only heard her speak a handful of times. Normally, she just looks at me, smiles and shakes or nods her head in response to questions.

I really like my cooperating teacher this semester. This is probably the best semester that I've had for practicum so far. I really am one of those people who needs a kick in the butt to get going, and even though we worked well together, I think it's better for me to be on my own than with Jen. I actually talk to my teacher instead of letting someone else be my voice. Heidi's pretty great. Even though kindergarten's really not my thing (I just can't be so chipper all the time), I feel like I could do it now if I was ever in a position where I'd need to, because she's taught me so much. Hallmark moment? Note to self: get her a card and a snowman collectible when I leave.

Next week, I don't have practicum at all. Oh the joy of statewide conferences. Wednesday, Heidi's doing parent-teacher conferences, and I said I'd like to come see some of those, so I'll go in for a bit after that. It's going to be a bit of a blast back to the pre-practicum days of the semester next week, though, which shall indeed be amazing.

Essence's birthday party's next week, too. Friday. And then Anna and I are going to see Rent that night. It'll be a good week next week, methinks.

I notice a change that occurred, I think, over the last year. Aside from the occasional freak out, my anxiety level has dropped considerably. I don't get the heart pounding my chest feeling anymore about simple things. Or even about things that should maybe still make me nervous? Instead I just talk more than anyone should have to hear and become full of restless energy. Maybe having to get up in front of those kids all the time made me realize that things like that shouldn't bother me? I don't know. Maybe I grew out of it. Or thought myself out of it. Moving out on my own made it essential for me to go out and socialize on my own, too. So perhaps a combination of things.

"Wonky" is a unique word. Vince, my boss in technical services, used it once this summer and it's made its way into my thoughts more than once. I finished the last sentence in the above paragraph and thought to myself, "That paragaph looks wonky." Yeah, I know. I don't get it either.

This is getting long. I don't know that my pictures have saved us from text-heaviness, kind reader. I apologize for the oversight in not spreading out the images. I will do better next time.